Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Curb Cuts to Nowhere is on Pinterest

Feel free to share any curb cuts to nowhere you come across; just send them to me at Twitter, and I'll share them here at the blog and here at Pinterest.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

A buncha turkeys in South Jersey

We interrupt the slow news cycle of curb cuts to nowhere to briefly examine another nonsensical attempt to control the sprawling (in the worst sense of the word) landscape. So, let's talk turkey: The government of Hainesport, a community in Burlington County, New Jersey, has decided to ban the feeding of wild turkeys, because a few citizens appear to be frightened of these creatures; indeed, they can be a bit intimidating, though I prefer the term magnificent. Under the terms of the law, people can be fined a couple thousands bucks if they knowingly and willingly feed the wild turkeys in their community. Not only is it senseless, it is probably unenforceable. First, shouldn't the cops be looking out for real crooks? Meanwhile, any soul who just looks up turkeys on the Internet will learn that they eat much more than your garden-variety birdseed. They eat bugs, spiders, slugs and even small snakes, as well as vegetation. So a silly "ban" on feeding will just send the turkeys out on the hunt for other food. A quick look at a map of the Hainesport area shows the real root cause of the problem. It comes in all shapes and sizes, but mostly (as my geography professor would call it) loops and lollipops, aka, housing developments, cul-de-sacs and the like (and probably a few curb cuts to nowhere somewhere on the landscape). It's a little late, I'm sure, to unring that bell, since the greedy community leaders all salivated at the thought of all those property-tax-paying ratables coming in to town. After all, what's the loss of a few patches of woods and fields in exchange for all that tax money. (I plead ignorance about whether there are any 55+ communities there, but given the boom of those places in recent past, I'd bet a buck that there are some in and around Hainesport. They bring a whole other set of problems -- if the 55+ folks have no kids in school, what incentive do they have to support the school budget? -- but that's another story.) But ringing this new bell, sounding this alarm, over (gasp!) wild turkeys on the loose, is merely grasping at (turkeys in the) straw. Besides, maybe they can teach us a thing or two about sustainable living...at least they already know to take public transit.